"Counselling"
by Fuuyuki
Warning tag: a little bit of stucky in my mind
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After Bucky gave up running, he stays with Steve in the Avengers. Even though Bucky now can remember most of the memories he once lost during the brainwash, those he never want to remind again do come in one inseparable package.
Those cursed memories always trap Bucky in nightmare which even gets his nerves on edge during day-time.
There was one time, when Bucky was taking a walk with Steve in the Central-Park. Suddenly, a plastic flying disc threw towards them. Bucky spontaneously jumped forward and caught the disc with his hidden metal arm and it squashed horribly. Those kids who were playing with the disc rushed in and planned to claim back their toy. However, they all either cried or ran away immediately after looking at Bucky’s face.
Steve frowned and was anxious in the situation.
Bucky was shook and then froze when he heard the cry from the kids. Then, he turned back and walked back to the Avengers Tower without giving a word.
He locked himself in his dorm, no matter how hard Steve tried to comfort him on the other side of the door.
Later, when Steve's despondently sitting in the couch and hoping Bucky would come outside on his own, he rewind what happened in the park this morning and found it sounded familiar.
Just a few days before he saw Bucky again in a fight, he heard someone sharing similar experiences in a counseling section.
He then pulled out his phone and called Sam Wilson who is now known as Falcon in the Avengers. But more importantly, before being a member of Avengers, he was the counselor at the Veterans Affairs for people who come home with PTSD. He’s a expert to deal with these kinds of situation.
Sooner, Sam came to help as a friend of Steve, or as a friend of Bucky if Bucky’s fine with it.
Thank for the assistance of the Expert Sam Wilson, Bucky was significantly getting better within a short period of time.
However, Sam still warned Steve under the counter about Bucky’s terrible situation. There was no way to compare the situation of PTSD from a retired soldier to what Bucky had faced in the past. Bucky was too damaged to be fully recovered.
Steve was silent for a while and then gave Sam a positive smirk. Steve told Sam, more likely to himself, he believed Bucky will eventually recover one day, as long as he’s staying by his side, the nightmare will go away forever.
Looking into Steve’s confident eyes, Sam returned a smile and joked about it’s lucky Steve did not take his advice back in the time.
-- I don’t think he’s the kind of guy you save. He’s the kind you stop.
Because Steve Rogers DID save Bucky Barnes.
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BUCKY放棄了潛逃後,跟蹤STEVE留了在AVENGERS。雖然BUCKY已經記起大部份洗腦前的記憶,但同時間他無法擺脫身為WINTER SOLDIER時的記憶。
於是BUCKY總是發惡夢,還會神經緊張。
某次經過公園,一個飛盤向他們的方向飛過來,BUCKY條件反射地用左手把它擋下來,當下立即把它握爛。那些原本跑過來想接回飛盤的小朋友們被他臉上的殺氣給嚇得都哭了出來。
之後BUCKY默不作聲地一個人轉身回到AVENGERS TOWER,把自己困在寢室內。
任STEVE怎樣擔心地在外面勸誘及安慰都沒有半點反應。
STEVE只能沮喪地坐在外面的沙發上,等待對方會主動走出來。這時候STEVE回想起剛剛在公園的事,突然覺得似曾相識。在再次遇到BUCKY的不久之前,他在退伍軍人事務部曾經聽過別人分享同樣的情況。
於是他立即撥通了電話,請SAM WILSON -- 現在於AVEGNERS活動的FALCON來幫忙。曾經於退伍軍人事務部當任PTSD(創傷後精神壓力症)顧問的他,在對應這些情況一定很有經驗。
當然SAM沒有表明自己過去的身份,他只是以STEVE的朋友的身份,當然只要BUCKY願意,他也可以以BUCKY的朋友的身份來找他聊天。
在SAM的協助下,BUCKY的情況開始有點好轉。
但SAM也私下跟STEVE表示,以BUCKY所經歷過的過去,並不是一般退任軍人的PTSD所能比較的。他所有過的精神創傷已經遠超可以完全康復的地步。
即使這樣,STEVE還是給對方一個淺笑,樂觀地認為,只要自己留在BUCKY的身邊,總有一天BUCKY就會好起來,不會再受夢魘所困。
看到這麼有自信的STEVE,SAM笑著說幸好當初對方沒有聽自己的勸諫。
-- I don’t think he’s the kind of guy you save. He’s the kind you stop.
因為STEVE真的成功拯救了BUCKY。